Stressology 201

Stressology 201

The Scientific Study of Keeping It Together When the Classroom Falls Apart

Welcome to Dr. Stymie’s Lab, where the lesson plan is flawless, the coffee is hot, and everything is under control... until the students arrive. Stressology 201 examines the unpredictable forces behind classroom stress, including forgotten assignments, broken technology, surprise observations, nonstop questions, mysterious noises, missing pencils, and the student who raises a hand just as the bell rings.

Dr. Stymie’s research suggests that surviving classroom chaos requires patience, perspective, humor, boundaries, occasional deep breathing, and knowing when to simply accept that today’s experiment has gone completely off the rails. Some days, success means delivering an inspiring lesson. Other days, it means everyone leaves the classroom with roughly the same number of limbs they arrived with.

Possible side effects of prolonged teaching include talking to yourself, hiding emergency snacks in your desk, reheating the same cup of coffee four times, and developing the supernatural ability to hear whispering from 30 feet away.

Remember: You can’t control the chaos. You can only grade it later.

CLASSROOM TESTED • SCIENTIFICALLY QUESTIONABLE • STUDENT APPROVED

Gildan 3000 Light Cotton T-Shirt

• 4.45 oz.yd² (US)

• 7.4 oz. L yd (CA)

• 100% U.S. cotton, 30 singles

• Ash Grey is 99% polyester, 1% cotton

• Sport Grey is 90% black polyester, 10% cotton

• Dark Heather, Graphite Heather, Heather & Safety colors are 50/50 cotton/polyester

• Features Innovation you can feel. Made with 100% U.S. cotton and the latest breakthrough in soft cotton technology, the Gildan®

• Light Cotton family has been remastered for improved printability, quality and comfort you can see and feel.

• Modern classic fit

• Narrow width, rib collar

• Taped neck and shoulders

• High-performing recycled tearaway label

• Made With Respect Gildan partners with Better Cotton to improve cotton farming globally

• Made with OEKO-TEX certified low-impact dyes

• We reduce plastic waste by the removal of polybags from all products except color White

Gildan G185 Adult Heavy Blend 8 oz., 50/50 Hood

• 8 oz.,

• 50% cotton 50% polyester blend

• Heather Sport colors: 60% polyester, 40% cotton

• Pill-resistant air jet yarn

• Classic fit

• Double-lined hood with color-matched drawcord

• 1 x 1 rib with spandex for enhanced stretch and recovery

• Pouch pocket

• Tear away label

Gildan G240 Adult Ultra Cotton 6 oz. Long-Sleeve T-Shirt

• 6 oz.,

• 100% USA cotton

• Ash Grey is 99% cotton / 1% poly ; Sport Grey is 90% cotton / 1% poly

• Dark Heather, Safety Green and Safety Orange are 50% cotton, 50% polyester

• Standard fitting

• Non-topstitched, classic width, rib collar

• Made with sustainably and fairly grown USA cotton

• Double-needle stitching throughout

• Taped shoulder-to-shoulder

• Ribbed cuffs

• Safety colors available

• Safety Green is compliant with ANSI/ISEA 107 high-visibility standards for background color

• This product is transitioning from tag-free labels to tear-away labels. Your order may contain a combination of both.