Rockology 201
Rockology 201
Rockology 201
The Scientific Study of Riffs, Rebellion & Excessive Volume
Welcome to Dr. Stymie’s Lab Music Division, where the amplifiers go to eleven, the guitars are plugged in, and hearing protection is considered legitimate laboratory equipment.
Rockology 201 investigates the powerful scientific relationship between riffs, power chords, distortion, solos, drums, volume, and attitude. Because rock isn’t just music. It’s what happens when electricity meets a guitar and somebody decides three minutes without a solo is entirely unacceptable.
After decades of high-decibel experimentation, Dr. Stymie developed the definitive rock equation:
Guitar + Amplifier + Attitude = ROCK
Perfect for guitar players, drummers, musicians, music teachers, garage-band survivors, concert addicts, classic-rock fans, and anyone who has ever played an imaginary guitar solo when nobody was watching.
Research Assistant #001 serves as the Lab’s official Chief Roadie, although his responsibilities seem limited to wearing sunglasses, guarding the equipment, and looking significantly cooler than the band.
Possible side effects include spontaneous head banging, aggressive dashboard drumming, excessive air guitar, purchasing another guitar because “this one sounds different,” and turning the volume up whenever someone asks you to turn it down.
Dr. Stymie’s conclusion?
“If it’s too loud, your experiment isn’t finished.”
FIELD TESTED • SCIENTIFICALLY QUESTIONABLE • BEST PLAYED LOUD
Dr. Stymie’s Lab Music Division Trust Me, I’m a Doctor.
Gildan 3000 Light Cotton T-Shirt
- 4.45 oz.yd² (US)
- 7.4 oz. L yd (CA)
- 100% U.S. cotton, 30 singles
- Ash Grey is 99% polyester, 1% cotton
- Sport Grey is 90% black polyester, 10% cotton
- Dark Heather, Graphite Heather, Heather & Safety colors are 50/50 cotton/polyester
- Features Innovation you can feel. Made with 100% U.S. cotton and the latest breakthrough in soft cotton technology, the Gildan®
- Light Cotton family has been remastered for improved printability, quality and comfort you can see and feel.
- Modern classic fit
- Narrow width, rib collar
- Taped neck and shoulders
- High-performing recycled tearaway label
- Made With Respect Gildan partners with Better Cotton to improve cotton farming globally
- Made with OEKO-TEX certified low-impact dyes
- We reduce plastic waste by the removal of polybags from all products except color White
Gildan G180 Adult Heavy Blend 8 oz., 50/50 Fleece Crew
- 8 oz.,
- 50% cotton, 50% polyester blend fabric
- Classic fit
- 1x1 rib with spandex for enhanced stretch and recovery
- Tear away label
| Size | Body length | Body width | Sleeve length |
|---|---|---|---|
| XS | 26" | 18" | 32 1/2" |
| S | 20" | 33" | |
| M | 22" | 34" | |
| L | 24" | 35" | |
| XL | 26" | 36" | |
| 2XL | 28" | 37" | |
| 3XL | 30" | 38" | |
| 4XL | 32" | 39" | |
| 5XL | 34" | 40" |
Gildan G185 Adult Heavy Blend 8 oz., 50/50 Hood
- 8 oz.,
- 50% cotton 50% polyester blend
- Heather Sport colors: 60% polyester, 40% cotton
- Pill-resistant air jet yarn
- Classic fit
- Double-lined hood with color-matched drawcord
- 1 x 1 rib with spandex for enhanced stretch and recovery
- Pouch pocket
- Tear away label
| Size | Body length | Full body length | Body width | Sleeve length |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| XS | 26" | 26" | 18" | 32 1/2" |
| S | 27" | 27" | 20" | 33" |
| M | 28" | 28" | 22" | 34" |
| L | 29" | 29" | 24" | 35" |
| XL | 30" | 30" | 26" | 36" |
| 2XL | 31" | 31" | 28" | 37" |
| 3XL | 32" | 32" | 30" | 38" |
| 4XL | 33" | 33" | 32" | 39" |
| 5XL | 34" | 30" | 34" | 40" |